I am sooo looking forward to July 4th this year. Not because of the festivities, but just because I wont have to come in to this place. I have worked about 15 days in a row. Now, I know that some people are work-aholics and working 7 days a week isnt so foreign to them, but I am NOT a work-aholic. I cherish my days off like most people. I am just running out of steam.
A few minutes ago, I was feeling weird. Like I-might-pass-out kind of weird. Not sure what that was about, but I am feeling a bit better now. I took one Goody powder, one half xanax, and one propranolol 40mg. Amazing what drugs can do.
My wrists are feeling a little better. I am pushing on. I do hope that I dont do any permanent damage. I doubt I will. I am actually trying to take really good care of them. I am taking anti-inflammatory meds, and wearing a brace, and trying not to do much house work...
The husband called last night and asked if he could "sneak by" and watch my new favorite TV show, ICE ROAD TRUCKERS, with me. Hmmm. He called around 4pm and I purposely didnt answer, because I new he would want to come over. So, he called back around 8pm, and I thought it would be safe to answer, because it was too late for him to swing by...right? Well, I answered, and that is when has asked if he could "sneak by". I said, "I really wasn't expecting company tonight, so." Lucky for me, he took that as a NO, and kinda rambled on for a second or two, and then let me go. He sounded shocked that I said no, even if it was a weak, or implied "no". This is the first weekend that I can remember, that he didn't wriggle his way over to my house for one reason or another. It feels better this way. It feels like it is supposed to feel. I DONT WANT HIM AT MY HOUSE EVERY WEEKEND. IT IS MY HOUSE DAMN IT!
TAKE YOUR SHIT AND STAY AWAY. YOU ARE THE ONE THAT WANTED TO MOVE OUT...YOU WANTED THE DIVORCE, EVEN IF YOU ARE TOO CHICKEN SHIT TO ADMIT IT. NOW BE A MAN AND STAY THE FUCK AWAY. STOP DOING YOUR "PUSSY CHECK" CALLS, AND STOP TRYING TO BE MY FRIEND!
Geez. Sorry about that.
I took Frankie, the bulldog, for a walk this morning. It felt good. He can't walk very far, so I am going to start taking him for walks in the morning, when it is cooler outside, and then I will do a more vigorous walk alone in the afternoon when it is hot. Just finally getting out there this morning is a beginning.
Time for my divorce self-makeover. Don't we all get one?? Lose weight, get in shape, and become the person we always wanted to be...
The make-over phase has begun. Too bad the get-your-shit-out phase isn't over yet. I hadn't meant for those to overlap...but, the husband is dragging out his part.
I am excited.
4 comments:
This, unfortunately, is what you have to say: "TAKE YOUR SHIT AND STAY AWAY. YOU ARE THE ONE THAT WANTED TO MOVE OUT...YOU WANTED THE DIVORCE, EVEN IF YOU ARE TOO CHICKEN SHIT TO ADMIT IT. NOW BE A MAN AND STAY THE FUCK AWAY. STOP DOING YOUR "PUSSY CHECK" CALLS, AND STOP TRYING TO BE MY FRIEND!"
You are getting to that point, even tho' it will hurt you AND him (and vice-versa, if you didn't get the "AND" part the first time). Quit whining and pull on your big-girl panties. No-one else can do it for you...
You are right! I do need to quit whining and pull on my big girl panties. I have to stop worrying about hurting his feelings...or mine.
Come on, cant someone else do it for me, PLEAAASE! I dont want to be a big girl anymore.
No, really. I do want to be a big girl. I'm pretty good at it sometimes.
I am so very happy to see you, my darling, veiner-schnitzel...
I feel pretty bad, else I'd write more. It takes a lot out of me, believe it or not. Just give me (and 'it') a little time...
Oh, I meant to say "man-up and be a woman", as well...
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