Okay, I have a couple of things on my mind today. I had to make myself stop and take a break from data entry for just a moment, so that I could type out all the thoughts swirling around in my head and try to make a little sense of it all.

First of all, I am having a problem being a friend right now. Yes, I typed that right...I am having a problem being a friend. I am a very private person, and as you have learned in a previous entry, I do not like criticism. I guess maybe I am too sensitive - I am a worrier. I worry about everything all the time. Friends give me just a little more to worry about, and I have a huge problem with it. I like my friends...I even LOVE my friends. I have had the same best friend since the 6th grade. But, with friendship, comes responsibility...like biting my tongue when I really just want to say chill the fuck out, or shut the hell up. I am purposely very passive with my friends, and I listen to them talk on and on and on about their lives, because I want them to know I am here for them always. But, I also do not speak up when I need to. I am not always honest about my opinions, because I dont want to hurt anyone's feelings. My friends; however, do not show me the same courtesy. Damn...I am not really saying what I want to say here.

Let's start over...What I am trying to say is - my friends can be very opinionated people, and I feel that I get lost in there somewhere. They always talk about hating this and hating that. They hate the way the kids wear their hair these days, or I have one friend that HATES everyone that buys a pure bread puppy, or that doesnt spay or neuter their pets. I agree that everyone should spay or neuter their pets, but I dont hate anyone who doesn't. Some people have different reasons for doing what they do. I have an English Bulldog, and I do not plan on having him neutered until I get one puppy out of him. I want to make sure I have another little bulldog running around without having to pay $1800 for another one. They are sweet dogs. I never let him out of my site, so he isn't going to inpregnate some poor unsuspecting doggy running around. Anyway. To her, I am a moron, but I keep my mouth shut, because she is a bitch, and I wouldn't be able to reason with her anyway. She sends out all this PETA propaganda (I don't like PETA, by the way), and I delete it. For some reason I always read a little bit of her messages that are sent with the propaganda, and it always pisses me off.

I have another friend that is renting the house next door to me, and I am having problems there too...I am just afraid she is going to get too nosey about the problems going on between myself and my husband...

This entry is getting too long. I have to cut this off now.

More later.